|
Well Ashamed, I pride myself at understanding people.. Here is my take..
Your wife is an Ex Dancer (Stripper) used to attention from guys, doesnt see anything with expressing herself sexually or letting guys dangle on the string for her in the past.
Now she is married, and where you expect a faithful relationship, she still has some mental baggage. Granted to this point she has been good to you, but in this case, she was getting bored, someone else sparked her interest and she gave in.
Girls can be soo stupid, enticed into doing untrustworthy cold hearted things, at least ur wife is somewhat remorseful, i know many that would still think nothing happened.. You have to come with terms that your wife can still be dumb and that your the smart logic one in the relationship.
Confronting her was very good, and sticking with her is also good but realise she wants attention and is used to flirting from her previous days so she fell back..
Here is my list of suggestions on how to fix.
A. keep the punishment short, you let her know, shes remorseful, now be the Bigger man and Show her a stronger frame that that other guy. Be the winner she married, so she buys back into it..
B. Marriage counseling is good, but like i said try not to make a super big deal out of it, goes back to keeping the punishment short.. You caught her, slapped her on the wrist, now give her the opportunity to make up for it. If you play your cards right and over and out do the competitor she may even fall deeper into love with you than before. You need to demonstrate Higher Value than that guy and shell be in ur arms again very quick. Over doing the punishment, or making a bigger deal out of it, or acting really hurt for a while is demonstrating lower value, this may in fact push her away or make her reconsider her attachment to you..
She fuked up thats for sure, you slapped her on the wrist, now prove ur 10x the man that guy is and make her fall even harder for you.. Always keep your guard up though, dont give her your string/trust back so quickly, or she will walk on you again. Slowly give it back. You must show her you dissaprove of her actions and she must earn you back just make sure u take the opportunities when she presents them.. Keep a strong frame and be the Man in the relationship with the Control.
As for kids, when you both do get close nit with each other again and things do start going well, Maybe a kid is a good idea actually.. It does secure her with you into a Family, it also gives her an Out and another Focus for her time and something else to do, it also makes her less wanted by other guys.. When you do get back solid with her, the kid thing may help in the long run her maternal instincts come out, she will become a different kind of woman and maintaining a strong frame and control with her will be much easier. Just make sure ur not on rocky waters when you do go this route..
Wish you the best!
|