Hey guys,
I JUST KNEW SOMETHING WAS GOING TO GO WRONG !!!
Yup! So I arrive at 8:30am for 8:45am appointment only to discover my car has no service package. WTF !!!
Who buys a new car with no service package? I am SURE I negotiated this with sales back in January. I've been buying cars for over 30 years and BMWs for over 20. I always get a service package!!!
So, service guy "J" goes and checks with someone. J comes back and confirms there's no service package.
He offers to sell me one. No thanks.
I ask how much the service will be (first oil change and visual inspection combined). J says it will be about AUD$700.
Alarm bells, clangers, clappers, klaxons and sirens are all going off in my head. I'm sure steam was coming out of my ears, my eyes were going bloodshot and my skin was turning green like the Hulk, but I managed to calmly decline, took my key and left.
Driving into the office I was wishing for some blood pressure pills ... but I've never had them. I could have done with a cigarette ... but I don't smoke. A bottle of Jack Walker would have been handy, but it was just after 8:30am ... I suppose it's 4:00pm somewhere though, right?
Drugs ... I need some drugs ... but I wouldn't know what to ask for or who to ask ...
This ... was ... going ... to ... be ... a ... bad ... day!
I called the sales rep who sold me the car. It was his day off so I got his voicemail. I left him a message and gave him a damn good bollocking !!!
It didn't help.
Then a thought popped into my head ... I'll call BMW Australia Head Office !!! That'll show 'em !!!
I had to muscle up all of my will power not to EXPLODE on the phone to the kind person, K, at BMW Australia after-sales support team as I explained what had happened. K informed me that the dealership was a franchise and I'd have to deal with them. K also said if I DO have servicing included, it will be listed on the Contract. K gave me the contact details for the Sales Manager, F, at my dealership. K apologised on behalf of BMW Australia, wished me a good day and happy motoring in my BMW.
Aaaaaaarrrrrgggghhh !!!!!!
For the next 10 minutes I abused every motorist who got in my way. I leaned on the horn, tailgated slow cars, and made gestures that made my BMW Gesture Control unit blush, shouted profanities that would have had the BMW Voice Recognition system delete itself if it could, before calmly walking into the office and quietly asking my secretary to fetch a copy of my X5 Contract of sale.
So, I get my Contract and there, listed under Aftermarket Accessories, it reads,
99 - 3 Years BSI or 60,000kms
hmmmm .....
Google = "BMW BSI"
Jackpot! BSI = BMW Service Inclusive
Click link to BMW ... read, read, read ... yup, uhuh, I remember discussing this with the sales rep ... yup, I remember selecting standard BSI, not BSI Plus.
I'm now dancing around the office like Steve Martin in a scene from Dirty Rotten Scoundrels.
I show all of my staff that I'm right, they're wrong, I'm the king of the castle. One asks what I'm gonna do about it. Another reminds me that I've just burned 2 hours of my day for nothing ... ... ... I suddenly feel like firing someone ... Trump would! He'd fire 2 or 3 ...
I decided to call the Sales Manager, F, at the dealership. I told my secretary to get them on the line. But my secretary comes in and begs me to calm down first. She starts singing,
"It's a small world after all, it's a small world after all ... ... ... "
She says,
"Think of yummy cakes, puppy dogs, rainbows and unicorns."
I said,
"In that order?
She replied,
"Well, go for a walk, think of YOUR favourite things, and sing your favourite song. I'll come back in 10 minutes and we'll call F then."
So I started humming "Mr Natural" by Mental As Anything. I took a walk ... to the bathroom and had a good long piss in the can while I thought about MY favourite things: Money, BMWs (especially M5 Competition), hot chicks on the beach, ice-cold beer ... and seafood barbecues.
I felt much better!
Dammit ... my secretary was right ... again ... better not sack her ... yet!
Secretary gets BMW on the phone and I speak to Sales Manager, F. I've never met him. He sounds nice. Probably young. Sharp. Enthusiastic. I explain my situation, while waving my Contract around for the staff in my office to see ... like THAT'S gonna make a difference!
F seems very understanding. He get's my Contract up on his screen. F agrees with me. Servicing is included. He says he'll put it on the system now ... and he'll start it from today. I get 3 years scheduled servicing dated from today. I can't complain about that now, can I?! I'm starting to like F. F offers to reschedule for later this week and he'll lend me the car he's driving for the day. I suggest tomorrow morning. F says he'll check with the Service Department. We then have a nice chat about cars and stuff and how I'm buying a M5 Competition ... right after I win the Lottery !!!
Half an hour later J from the Service Department calls me. He also apologises for the mix up. We book the car for tomorrow morning. He says the loaner is ready and the service will take 90 minutes to 2 hours. I suggest waiting around if it's going to be that quick. I confirm it's the Oil Service, Visual Inspection, and Car Wash. J confirms and I said I'm looking forward to take-2 tomorrow.
Happy Days !!!
Lucky I didn't fire my secretary ... yet!
I'll let you guys know how the service goes tomorrow.