| 03-08-2024, 12:12 PM | #1365 |
|
Major General
 
43736
Rep 7,224
Posts |
A few jokes from the internet about us older folks
What’s the secret to having a smoking hot body as a senior? Cremation. I used to know a couple who grew fruit trees together. They lived to a ripe old age. Old age makes us great multitaskers. Why, I can sneeze and pee at the same time. One benefit of old age is that your secrets are always safe with your friends… because they can’t remember them. Stop thinking of them as “hot flashes.” Think of them as your inner child playing with matches. Now that I’ve gotten older, everything’s finally starting to click for me. My knees, my back, my neck… I called the incontinence hotline recently. They asked if I could hold.
__________________
 |
|
Appreciate
6
|
| 03-09-2024, 04:58 AM | #1367 |
|
Captain
 
17401
Rep 873
Posts |
People will be shocked when they discover how bad an electrician I am.
__________________
Wha' da ya mean? No brakes never stopped anyone before!
|
|
Appreciate
6
|
| 03-11-2024, 01:16 PM | #1368 | |
|
Brigadier General
11414
Rep 3,406
Posts |
Quote:
|
|
| 03-11-2024, 02:07 PM | #1369 | |
|
Lieutenant Colonel
 
5206
Rep 1,792
Posts
Drives: 2022 M850 GC - Carbon Black
Join Date: Feb 2017
Location: PDX
|
Quote:
|
|
| 03-11-2024, 02:10 PM | #1370 |
|
Major General
43736
Rep 7,224
Posts |
What do electricians call a power outage?
A current event.
__________________
|
|
Appreciate
6
|
| 03-13-2024, 11:21 AM | #1373 |
|
Major General
13347
Rep 7,484
Posts |
Why did the electrician get killed in a debate?
They say he used conductive reasoning. |
| 03-14-2024, 09:44 AM | #1375 |
|
Major General
13347
Rep 7,484
Posts |
Well I missed y'all a latte and can’t espresso how excited I am! The Jaguar F pace dream ended. The F pace forum was dry anyway. I went back to a BMW last week... life is hectic so will log in when I can. You well? Hope so.
|
| 03-14-2024, 11:07 AM | #1376 | |
|
Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner
18016
Rep 9,378
Posts |
Quote:
__________________
I have romped on her and I giggled like a drunk infant the entire time. - Sedan_Clan
|
|
| 03-17-2024, 05:43 PM | #1378 |
|
Major General
13531
Rep 5,210
Posts |
A man and his young wife were in divorce court, but the custody of their children posed a problem. The mother gets up and says to the judge that since she brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them. The man also wanted custody of his children, so the judge asked for his justification. After a long silence, the man slowly rose from his chair and replied, "Your Honor, when I put a dollar in a vending machine and a Coke comes out, does the Coke belong to me or the machine?"
|
|
Appreciate
8
Esteban43736.00 2000cs3502.50 Llarry15947.50 Pauly Wauly2220.50 Buug95917400.50 BMWGUYinCO4122.50 Soul_Glo13347.00 Andrew2180.00 |
| 03-18-2024, 02:12 PM | #1379 |
|
Major General
43736
Rep 7,224
Posts |
Some St. Paddy's Day jokes:
What is a leprechaun’s favorite type of music? Sham-rock ‘n’ roll. What do you call an Irish spider? Paddy long legs. What do you call a fake Irish diamond? A shamrock. When is an Irish potato not an Irish potato? When it’s a French fry. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Erin. Erin who? Erin as fast as I could, but I couldn’t catch the leprechaun. How can you tell if an Irishman is having a good time? He's Dublin over with laughter.
__________________
|
| 03-19-2024, 08:35 AM | #1381 |
|
Friends don't let friends ESS
3163
Rep 871
Posts
Drives: '11 Lemans Blue 6mt Harrop e90
Join Date: Dec 2020
Location: Camas, WA
iTrader: (0)
Garage List 2011 E90 M3 [9.00]
2003 Porsche 911 Turbo [9.75] 2019 BMW X5 xDrive40i [0.00] 2013 Mercedes E550 ... [0.00] |
There was a snake crawling out of my face last night.
The good news is that I killed it. The bad news is that I need a new CPAP hose. |
| 03-19-2024, 08:48 AM | #1382 | |
|
Major General
13531
Rep 5,210
Posts |
Quote:
I raise my hand to hit it but missed aim and hit my balls instead. Aaaasrgh....The mosquito must have LOL. |
|
Post Reply |
| Bookmarks |
|
|
