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      03-07-2024, 04:26 PM   #45
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It will be in the form of court order get the BLEEP out.

All he had to do was contribute to household, rent or food or pay for cable. It's time for life to give a giant kick in the ass.
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      03-07-2024, 06:05 PM   #46
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My wife watched a Lifetime movie that was like this. Can't believe she watched that channel - she's now moved on to Hallmark.

Anyway it was about a young married couple who hired a live-in nanny to take care of their kids. It didn't work out and they fired her but she wouldn't leave.

She filed against them in court saying she lived there for a certain amount of time (don't remember what it was) and had rights and they couldn't make her leave.

She had guys over all the time and had parties in her room and it was a real nightmare for the young couple. Don't remember the details but they eventually got her out.

Can't believe I watched this with her. Never again. lol

Hope it all works out for you in the end.
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      03-07-2024, 08:28 PM   #47
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I’m watching The Gentleman on Netflix, there is a character that comes very close to your situation. If someone would have cut him off long ago, they would’ve saved themselves a lot of pain.
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      03-07-2024, 08:36 PM   #48
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Originally Posted by unluky View Post
This is 100% where I fear we are headed. I have voiced this to her as well. She is one of the most fun people I have ever been with. Literally everyone she meets loves her. So sweet, considerate, and forgiving. Both her oldest daughters are doing fantastic. One is a jr in college and has ALWAYS worked and made/saved $. Her oldest is in her 2nd year of dental school and doing very well - both great students and I have relationships with them outside of their mother. Literally have zero concerns there.

Her son though - is the issue. An I fear he will be the reason we break up like you had too, which would be a shame. But I am not signing up for a lifetime of that. I see him getting kicked out of college soon and moving in with mom - even though she tells me that is not happening ever. I'd bet every cent I have on it though.

Sucks.
It's called being co-dependent. I use to be that way and still struggle with it but mental health treatment has helped immensely. I'm betting she rarely says no to anyone, that's why everyone "loves" her. She isn't going to solve this issue because of that condition and will need counseling. It will be in your long term interest to help her through this.
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      03-07-2024, 10:34 PM   #49
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That sucks. If the court doesn’t work you can always just make his life miserable while he stays at your home to the point he has ptsd, and no longer wants to live there. Doing things like “harmless” pranks, like smearing butter on the bathroom floor or mixing ghost pepper oils in the toothpaste, etc. It works. I had to do similar things to a roommate of mine who was a freeloader as well. He finally broke and just left our apartment, breaking his lease. My other roommate said he couldn’t handle the daily uncertainty in his life anymore.
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      03-08-2024, 02:04 AM   #50
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I had to end a relationship over my girlfriend's daughter's baby-daddy. We (my girlfriend) met while walking in a park, hit it off, and it wasn't long before she and her daughter and the daughter's two girls were coming over to swim and cookout. For a couple of years life was great. I really thought I was in love and was considering putting a ring on her finger- till the baby-daddy got paroled. He was in for burglary. He never came to my house, thank God, but the pressure was there for me to allow him to join our "family gatherings". Nope, not my house. Something about this guy was telling me he wasn't done with his criminal ways. We broke up. I get that, I can't ask a mother to choose me over her daughter and grand-children. Found out later baby-daddy was caught red-handed in somebody's house and went back to prison to serve out the rest of his time.
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      03-08-2024, 08:54 AM   #51
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Our03z4 View Post
It's called being co-dependent. I use to be that way and still struggle with it but mental health treatment has helped immensely. I'm betting she rarely says no to anyone, that's why everyone "loves" her. She isn't going to solve this issue because of that condition and will need counseling. It will be in your long term interest to help her through this.
100% correct. They love her because she is open and funny as shit. She makes everyone laugh. But her family can and do ask and get anything they want from her. I tell her all the time - when it comes to her family (not just her kids) she is a doormat.
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      03-08-2024, 01:30 PM   #52
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Esteban View Post
My wife watched a Lifetime movie that was like this. Can't believe she watched that channel - she's now moved on to Hallmark.

Anyway it was about a young married couple who hired a live-in nanny to take care of their kids. It didn't work out and they fired her but she wouldn't leave.

She filed against them in court saying she lived there for a certain amount of time (don't remember what it was) and had rights and they couldn't make her leave.

She had guys over all the time and had parties in her room and it was a real nightmare for the young couple. Don't remember the details but they eventually got her out.

Can't believe I watched this with her. Never again. lol

Hope it all works out for you in the end.
Ever see the movie Pacific Heights?
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      03-08-2024, 01:53 PM   #53
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Originally Posted by ezaircon4jc View Post
Ever see the movie Pacific Heights?
Yep, a couple of times. A little different than the Lifetime movie.
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      03-08-2024, 07:30 PM   #54
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Originally Posted by c1pher View Post
Scenarios like this make me glad I don’t have a relationship with my kids. I rest easy knowing I did my job and they are self sufficient. Would I prefer to have a relationship? Sure but I was never their friend, I was their father.
Honestly one of the saddest posts I've read online.
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      03-08-2024, 09:43 PM   #55
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Honestly one of the saddest posts I've read online.
Don't worry, he said that it's just our "poor reading comprehension" making us think that.
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